When it’s time to say Adios to your partner and hello to your ex
A breakup may come in all shapes and forms. At times, you know the end of the relationship is near, the couple is just waiting for one person to pull the trigger and end it. I think some signs that it’s close are when the love is disappearing, you rather spend time with your friends over your significant other, you start wondering why you got together in the first place, you start complaining about your significant other to your friends, or you just feel like you are lying to yourself and destructing your own happiness by continuing this relationship. Another case is you may feel like you don’t bring the best out of each other. Maybe you have ambitions and dreams but how does your partner fit in all of this? Is there support, help, etc? Obviously, when the fights turn really bad, is it acceptable? Healthy arguments are essential because both are freely speaking their opinions and come to a mutual decision which is a bonding experience. However, if you can’t handle the stress when contradictions arise, are you prepared for the inevitable difficult times of the future. Either you end it now or get a divorce 10 years later, the choice is yours. Other times, it may come as a surprise, but I think moving on becomes a lot more challenging. Cheating/Lying are some of the toxic endings. Corner cases even come when religion or family opposes the relationship and it has to come to a conclusion due to the lack of blessings from family. Different mindsets due to age differences or just simply changing throughout the years may also happen. These are some of the relationship endings that’s happened to people I know and some of these reasons I can say have happened to me. The main point of this intro is no matter what, I think breaking up needs to be done delicately. After all, you can’t break up and treat your significant other with hate, breaking up needs to be done with the love you felt when you first started dating. Endings can be harsh, but they can be a beautiful step to the next part of your life when executed with love for each other and mainly for yourself.
Onto the Next One
When deciding that it’s over, in my opinion, endings are great, since this means that it is an opportunity for you to start a new beginning. Obviously, you are human, so at first, you will have the thought that wow, you have wasted x years with this one person when you could’ve been in Las Vegas meeting your actual wife. Jk, hopefully, you aren’t looking for your wife in Las Vegas but you get the point. Now the hardest part is what comes next? I strongly believe when you are in sadness, anger, regret, etc, don’t react. Don’t take action when you are clearly not your best self. Rather, use this as an opportunity to really dig up some of the things you’ve always wanted to do. After you’ve revealed your own treasure box, start prioritizing what you want to do first. It can be difficult but remember, that’s life, things happen for a reason. Don’t let this be something that brings you down, but let this make you better and now let’s focus on you becoming more true to yourself. Try to disconnect from your surroundings, get away from your bubble, and reconnect with yourself. But don’t try to forget, process what happened with your ex. Dissect all the uncomfortable thoughts and break down what happened, where it went wrong, and how you can grow from it. Self-compassion is also key. Remind yourself of all the beautiful memories that you shared with your ex because, in reality, the past was also beautiful, but now, you are ready for an even greater future.
Let’s Run It Back
When deciding that one should give the relationship another a shot, I think, if both people have grown and healed, then it is great. But never settle, never repeat mistakes, only fools repeat mistakes. If you want to be a fool, then you should pick the worst ex and propose asap. Life is too precious to take the same road when you know it’s not going to be a healthy path. Sure, maybe down the line, the other may heal and things may work out, after all, you can create the reasons for it. But imagine starting a new journey with someone at your level and mindset. That’s where the money is at. And when I say money, it’s not actual money, that’s greed. I’m talking bout actual love.
